'show me your friend and I'll tell you who you are'.. that's what they say about friends.. I say, 200% true!
when I look back, at every phase of my life, I've been friends with people who reflected the kind of person I was then.. the schooltime phase when I was an outspoken and totally outright brat, through those times when I've been most miserable, when I've been totally prejudiced, confused, while I was going through the toughest of times, and those times when I made up my mind to fight back and to get back to my true elements.. I've found that the people I made friends with then, were almost always going through a similar phase of life or state of mind..
That doesn't go to prove that I have an ever-changing friends list always.. yes, it is a list which keeps getting updated.. umm.. well almost yearly ( yeah, quite an objectve critic I am!) nothing reflects it more than the wishes I receive on my birthdays.. just celebrated another b'day last month.. a bunch of friends lost in the oblivion, and I find myself surrounded by a new set of friends..
Though there's always the usual crowd of friends who've been there since more than a decade now.. whom I can count on, even on my 60th birthday.. that's the most special of the lot.. they are the ones, I don't have much in common with.. we don't compete, we're not critical of each other.. we just believe in being there for each other and that equation keeps getting better all the way.. (DT, you're the one who comes to my mind first when I say that! as much as you hate me for saying this.. Thankyous... and a biiig hug to you!)
What happens is.. we keep growing.. sometimes we grow together.. sometimes we grow apart.. I have this friend, a real darling, who has stood by me during the toughest of times.. but surprisingly, when i started growing on a totally different sphere, we could not deal with it.. our views and attitudes varied.. and sometimes, when people can't agree to the differences they have between them (worse still when the differences keep growing over a period of time), prejudices creep in.. n then bitterness.. I'm so sorry, I lost my friend last year..
And then there are old time friends.. whom we never meet in a long long time.. n bingo! one day after decades, u meet up n realise that though u were not in touch all this while, u've grown up to be quite similar.. you can soo relate to them.. n strike a chord as though you've been best friends for years together..
yeah, I was lucky to catch up with my best friend of 1st standard at school!! can u believe that?! it was just soo much fun that we were laughing for most of the time! and when we weren't laughing, we were too busy with our 'exactly!'s and 'me too!'s and 'same here!'s and 'very true's.. It's like talking to a stranger, and still feeling as though you've always been the bestest of friends.. just wanted to let you know DR, that it was great to rediscover the friend in you.. I was all smiles, even after we hung up the phone.. :) n was going around happily telling my folks about it!
The irony as it just occured to me is that, going by the initials of names, the friend I lost last year, and the long lost friend I found now are both 'DR'. Theory of Replacement, eh? darn... I hate myself for trying to find logic in everything!! old habits die hard... or worse still.. they dont die at all!! :P