Thursday, March 29, 2007

bizzy bizzy...

I know it's been sometime since I really got to jot in something here...

My excuse: I've been keeping real real busy. But that, I always am, of late.. Guess I've got addicted to the state of being busy.. but every other time i get busy, my perception of being "hopelessly busy" is challenged.. it always gets higher in amplitude than what already was.

I do get bugged up when that happens.. when I'm pushed to the extreme.. but somehow end up feeling sooo good once I get over the challenge. I've started loving the whole process of listing it all out, prioritising, doing my AIs systematically.. it gets the best out of me.. i tend to be more proactive, the transparency in my communications improve.. n once I'm over it, there's nothing quite like it!

My current challenge: I've been put into this sustaining project team for the time being while the only QA lead of the team is out on maternity leave. I get to realise much later that I was just shown the tip of the iceberg during the TOI, and once she's gone, I find a 101 terminologies, test plans and scopes hurled at me all of a sudden. was like an avalanche of info in bits n bytes, none of which was making any sense to me + double the number of reference points, each one of them painting different pictures of a single concept.

was totally stumped, off guard, n found myself in the non-acceptance/non-compliance mode.. but now after a handful of meetings with my manager, concalls with the development lead who's in a remote location, and bugging my only 2 comdrades in the new team umpteen times, i find myself somewhat on-track. good for me!

Just realised the gravity of the situation clearly now! the bigger picture, the zoom-in picture, everything.. now the only thing left is execution in peace and some learning.

The bottomline is: I'm busy and I'm happy :)
hmm.. well.. not exactly.. one can never have enough when it's about the money!
money money money, it's so funny! :D

On the personal front, things were getting hectic as well..
Papa Mummy had come over to visit us for a couple of weeks. (guess, they got too tired of asking their 2 hopeless daughters to spare sometime and go home to join them.)

They just left for Trivandrum today evening.. I went home in the evening to see them off (from home - Papa somehow doesn't like the idea of us going to the railway station with them.. it's been like that always, if Papa's travelling, we had to see him off from home. The only time I ever saw him off was 9 years back.. I realised that its somehow kinda tough to say a bye-bye to Papa like that. I got a bout of viral fever that time, which lasted for a week. I never ever dared to do that again!)
The 1st thing I did as soon as they left, was to rearrange the furniture in the living room.. otherwise the whole place will remind me of them! whatever I do, when I step into the kitchen, it's got 'Mummy' written all over the place!

Ideally, I should've been sulking at home now. But I'm back at office! Had this concall to attend at 9:30pm, which just got called off at the last moment. All that happens, happens for a reason.. now, atleast it gave me the time to peep into this space! :)

In retrospect, just about 5 years back, I had this constant urge to fly away from home.. fly away from my nest, my comfort zone. Had this need to do things on my own.. travel places, create this 'space for myself', prove to myself that I'm much more capable of doing things.. I needed those challenges, to overcome them.. make the most of my abilities.. And that I did! the path was never too easy.. (might have something to do with my karma, I never got anything in life too easily..) Had to fight for it (to the extent that I doubt anything which somes too easy in life!), and I feel that has done me more good, 'coz I truly value what I've got!

Now, though, I feel good and pampered when I'm with my family, (Thank God, Hema and me are still together. And we do manage pretty well too..) but when MummyPapa are around, it feels sooooo good and just soo right! A totally enthusiastic Mummy, whose sole intention is to make sure she treats us to all our favourite food... and Papa who's always there for us.. was totally nostalgic when Papa came over to office at 10:30pm to pick me up after one of those late night con-calls. Reminded me of those school days when we used 2 wait eagerly in the School playground, waiting for Papa to come over and get us home.. with the much loved incentive of a cool 'Sip-up' from the nearby shop, incase he gets late!

These days I keep wondering, what's the big point in living if we are not with our loved ones! Getting lost in this mad rat-race is the rule of the day.. But I guess it's time for some introspection!

For my friends: I'm currently in one of those super busy phases of life.. pls do excuse me if you dont get to hear from me as often.. (i've already started getting a handful of complaints.. and so, thought of taking an anticipatory bail, rightaway!! :P ) i'll surely get back to form once I get done with this.. till then, take care n be good!

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

My Omnipresent God

got to watch one of those short stories which Star One is airing late nights these days.. yesterday's story was about this schoolgoing kid and his God.. there was something about the picturization which got my sleepyhead kicking! but that's not exactly what I'm here to talk about..

it got me thinking about this very personal relationship we share with our Gods.. yes, I believe we all have different perceptions of God.. the idea is that of a personalised God.. mebbe I'm a believer in the theory that God is present within each one of us.. it's our soul.. our conscience..

the best part about it was, it transcended me to those schooldays when I used to go to the school chapel n pray to God, very diligently, for saving me from Sr. Rosy's canings.. pray hard to save me from the humiliations at the hand of that rude History teacher.. pray so that the English teacher wont ask me questions about the life of Gandhi, which I might not be able to answer.. pray that the questionpaper for those test papers should be the ones, the answers of which I know.. pray that the misunderstanding between me and my bench-mate regarding some scuffle be cleared soon.. pray that Anjitha's troublesome neighbour shouldn't bother her Father anymore.. pray that I dont miss the bus to School in the morning.. pray that he takes care of my Amumma(grand-mom) living alone in Chennai .. many a things which might sound verrrry verrrry silly to think of right now.. but then, my life hung on all those small things..

The staunch convent school where I went to, we were told that copying the answers during a test paper, is the biggest sin of all.. n that the omnipresent God was watching from up above.. I knew my God was there with me, everywhere.. but the idea of God which was put into my li'l head then, was that of an unforgiving, punishing God.. but someone whom I can approach anytime with my supplication..
Once I did copy a tough math sum during one of those class tests at school.. (my neighbour had the text book opened in front of her.. n it was too much of a provocation to resist.. 'coz I had already made up my mind to score 10/10 for maths, n this sum was the only block!).. so, i copied it and was sure that I would be getting full marks for the test.. but there was this something, pricking me deep within.. guess what I found when I got my answer paper evaluated, I had done a silly calculation error which costed me dear.. infact, I had lost whatever marks I had gained by copying!!

My adult brain did understand that the 1st time copying act (btw, it was referred to as 'stealing' at school) must've really got me too tensed that I couldn't concentrate enough on the calculation at hand, and ended up doing it wrong!
but still there was this pseudo belief that if I am to do a sin, then I'll be made to pay for it too!

n I so totally believed in it all through even my Engg College days, that it held me back from copying during my University Exams.. it was afterall a biiig sin...

There were many daily activities which used to keep me tied to my God.. drawing a cross, whenever i walk past that image of Mother Mary in that corner of the school play ground, getting lilies for her.. wondering why sometimes life is unfair to some people.. whether truth and honesty are virtues anymore.. attending those moral science classes.. the stories we were told about believers... they were not exactly lessons on Do's and Don'ts.. rather we were exposed to a certain way of life which we happily followed..

n when I grew up, my idea of God changed.. he became more forgiving, a li'l more lenient, and quite many of the so-called sins were now chalta he types.. somewhere I got this idea that I shouldn't be bothering God for all these silly things.. I realised that God doesnt give us all that we ask for.. n somewhere along the way, my prayers became different.. it became more like: "God, you know what's the right thing.. if it's right, let it be so.. else, be it as you wish.."
n later on, i started believing the fact dat God keeps working on me.. n he knows wots right for me.. somewhere along the way my dialoges with my God (technically they may be monologues, though I prefer to see it as dialogues), kind of diminished to a quick prayer of rosary or a hastened Hail Mary when my mind is very troubled..

you know, i still remember very vividly the 1st miracle of my childhood days.. one day I lost my wooden ruler (this one was very special to me) at school and I was praying to God that he bring it back to me somehow.. n guess what, Amumma comes to pick me up from school in the evening, and asks me how did I manage without my ruler, and that I had left it near her bed and went to school that morning!! all this while, Im so sure I had taken it to school that morning and even used it!

now I dont bother my God for a missing ruler anymore, but I still do experience the miracles he works on me! in his own special ways.. sometimes I feel I'm so thankless to stop by and thank him for those innumerable blessings.. 'coz these days we believe that all our success is a result of our decisions and hardwork and foresight or wotever..

but the short story that I witnessed yesterday, helped me reach out to that humble girl within me, who believes that her omnipresent God is still watching over her.. with the guardian angels around her..

oh, it's such a comforting feel to think of God, and believe that he takes care of us all the way.. but wonder why we take all the stress in the world upon ourselves, when all we need is to stop by for a moment and say a silent prayer to God ..

reminds me of the prayer song at school..

"Guardian Angel From Heaven So Bright
Watching beside me to lead me aright
Fold thy wings round me O guard me with love
Softly sing songs to me Of heav'n above
Beautiful angel My guardian so mild
Tenderly guide me For I am thy Child"

this was a post-lunch prayer before the afternoon session started at school.. n somehow when I type it down this afternoon, I still can experience the calmness and serenity that the words bring with them..

it's soo re-assuring and I feel soo safe.. "Tenderly guide me for I am thy child"

God Bless you!

Monday, March 12, 2007

The Helmet funda (what's in the name?)

Hema always keeps asking questions that amaze me.. (contrary to her usual argument that i keep asking her a lot of why's and what's)

today morning, while leaving for work, she forgot to get her scooter helmet.. (now that the 'helmet rule' is made mandatory in Bangalore!)

she comes back to fetch it and I find her asking me this question: "why is the helmet called helmet? wot's d logic in its name? there should be something.. " n she went on to dissect the noun into two: "hell met"

is it because it goes n meets with hell, when it's actually your turn?
or could it be that if you dare not wear it, get ready to go to hell?

a couple of questions, and then I find her picking up her helmet and heading for work!

intrigued by the thought, I googled it, with no good result..
Wikipedia gave me a few insights on Helmets though.. its History and Heraldry and the different types of helmets in vogue.
and it also helped me learn about the World Health Organisation's Helmet Initiative and also find some statistics from the WHO on the same
Incase you are one of those helmet haters, then pls do yourself a favor by taking a look at this
If you have kids back home, why not get them real interested in helmets by sharing this info with them, on how to make a knightly helmet for themselves!

hmm.. so much for a public interest message..
Wear a Helmet and Drive Safe!

Friday, March 9, 2007

kachua bhaiya bhi dolat hai!

cartoon based storyboards always manage convey messages in such cute ways..
this one's one of my favorites these days..

starts with d kind-hearted chidiya rani.. followed by kachua bhaiya's urge to belong to the group .. n the concern n thoughtfulness of his siblings.. finally, sweet success!
it just fits too well in the "anticipation-fear-overcoming the fear-success with flying colors" mode, which most children's cartoon shows stick to..

lovely.. jai ho pankhon wali maiya! :)

Thursday, March 8, 2007

Happy Women's Day!!

Happy Women's Day, folks!

It's a beautiful day today.. more so because I see some clarity regarding what should be my next step (careerwise).. Had a meeting with my Manager the other day, and I must say, it was pretty fruitful.. in the sense, it helped me gauge the situation real well to make up my mind on what should my next road to travel!

I don't buy the argument to have a fixed destination in life.. was having a discussion with Hema, late in the evening yesterday about that.. it's the journey which gives me the high.. the best way I can live my life is to make my journey worthwhile..

ofcourse, I have my aims.. but the fact is that, once I make it to that, I dont tend to stop. I find myself a new aim.. and it just goes on.. Reminds me of Sr. Blossy's advice: "aim the sky, and you will reach the tree top".. but there are a lot of intermediate steps in between..u know, on the way to the sky.. which I set for myself from time to time! life would've been all too boring without them!

newys, what I was coming to, is that, this is one of those happy days when I feel totally in charge of my life.. (nopes.. um not talking abt delusions, here! not about bhangi golis/ecstasy, silly!) this is one of those days when I really feel like a hero!

On the occasion of Women's Day, pls do find sometime to read about these ACTION HEROES as well..

Have a rocking day! :)

PS: on a lighter note, wanted to share something interesting I found in a forwarded mail (from jyoti). not that I'm a male basher.. but I found the last line extremely hilarious!

Epilogue: so, we get an official mail from a lady in HR. they're planning to celebrate Women's Day in style by doing a private screening of Lage Raho Munnabhai, exclusively for the ladies in the IEC! n they promised gifts too..
yeah, obviously, before I finish reading the mail, I am on my way to there! I find a couple of friends near that hall, we grab our chairs and head in.. ok! so its work in progress.. n finally it's announced that there's a technical snag which prevents the screening! wah! kya baat he! n so the ladies decide to introduce themselves..

ok.. dont ask me what next, 'coz i just made my way out of there in disappointment.. bumped into another colleague on my way to my desk.. we grinned at each other.. "flop show!" i threw up my hands.. she said, "i know, Totally!" :D

end of story! or so I thought.. but no, it didn't, thankfully! read on..

Addendum to the Epilogue: hey!! i just went that way again (u know, d lure of gifts.. specifically, 'coz i knew that it's chocolates!!) the movie was running (though there weren't any audience) and yeah, the box of chocolates was sitting tight, right there, smiling at me.. got one pack for myself and another one for my less privileged (read men) team mates!
happy happy! :)

All's well that ends well!
hope you all had a great day too! :)

Tuesday, March 6, 2007

Audacity rediscovered?!

that's wot they say Mallika Sherawat is all about! I say, she rocks!

I watched Murder more than an year after it hit the screens, n must say, wasn't too impressed with her acting skills... but have always enjoyed the lady's famous quotes in print! not that I agree with her or something.. the fact is, i adore the lady's gutsiness to own upto her acts.. rmmbr sometime back, we used to have actresses doing similar stuff only to disown them later.. or play the poor li'l exploited girl... rmmbr Manisha Koirala in ek choti si love story n long back, an apologetic Gouthami, after doing a comparatively harmless Chiku buku raile..

i got to see the Koffee with Karan episode with Mallika only the other day.. man! wasn't she hilarious.. i mean, the way she went about churning those trademarked quotes.. like, "you want a girl next door? then go next door!" :D hahaha.. how funny can that get!

but yeah, as Sanjay Leela Bhansali rightly said, i too felt that she's got a somewhat twisted idea about self-confidence.. though i can't blame her for that, as she herself claims, it has got more to do with her haryanvi upbringing.. (on the basis of my short stint in North India, i can tell you that humility/modesty is widely [if not always] taken for meekness there... since it's a comparatively loud society)

people do bitch about her a lot.. now, I donno whether she sleeps around with influential ppl to make her way to stardom.. the fact is, I really dont care about it.. it's none of my business... what I like about her is her gutsiness, her rawness, her honesty.. n her witty on-the-face kinda quotes...

for once, you get to see dat smirk on Karan Johar's face, fade away...

she's been made fun of, all through his last season, just the way Rakhi Sawant (for some strange reason, i happen to like this woman too.. now, don't read into it as it's got to do with her being similar to Mallika, as they say. I feel, even she's carved a niche for herself in her own special way, which is interesting!) is, for his season 2.. i mean, one can't just ignore these women... why? they dont bare any more than most of the women in that industry do.. what's different is that they speak their minds more than they bare their bodies...

in these days of diplomatic celebrities ( c'mon, a rani mukherjee/ preity zinta / aishwary rai sound just too similar! the same oh-so-boring politically correct diplomatic lines..), these women have their individuality n attitude writ large on their face n I feel that's what takes them places.. 'coz ppl recognise them, for wot they are!

You call it Audacity rediscovered? I call it Individuality(in the show biz) rediscovered!

Thursday, March 1, 2007

in pin safety pin.. in pin out!

"pushpa... i hate tears..."
for me it's choices! I haaaate choices.. at times, when all the options sound equally good (/bad!), or worse still when it's totally beyond my discretion, more often when the decision is to be made for trivial stuff... but choices, I have to make.. no running away! aargh.. even running away isn't that easy, I have to choose to run!

it starts frm the moment the alarm goes off in the morning... "should I get up now, or go for the snooze?" (well, snooze is always my personal favorite though..)

the simplification formula always comes in handy... 'in pin safety pin..'
the trick is just too good for me to grow out of it.. It was a pretty ok thing to do at school.. I used to follow this one happily, even while at college.. though Tina used to give me that, "are u insane?" look then... that was when I was 18! a decade later, I still find myself resorting to the same old master simplification formula!

I believe its inventor must've been a real genius...u bet, decision making has never been so easy! :D it takes such a huge load off our li'l heads.. so that we can spare our wisdom for more important judgments.. you, mebbe deciding to switch jobs??!! well... ahem.. I wonder if it's ok to go for the same formula again!! ;) aadat se majboor hoon, u see..

now is this something worth posting?? lemme c.. in pin safety pin... ... there you go!! :)